In a new series entitled Nomadic Notes, I’m answering your most frequently asked questions. Consider these bite-sized blogs calorie-free treats of travel knowledge. =)
Relationships On The Road: Fitting Love in Your Backpack
I’ve seriously lost count of the number of e-mails I’ve received that start with, “So are you really a solo female traveler? I mean, don’t you have a boyfriend?”
These questions inevitably lead to others like, “How does traveling affect your romantic relationships?” and, “How do I find a significant other while traveling?”
Yes, I do travel solo. But as far as relationships are concerned, much like the Facebook status, it’s complicated.
I could sit here and spew facts and skills to use to help keep romance alive while on the road. I could provide you with a list of affirmations and tools that I think would be helpful in finding a travel mate. But if I did that, then this blog wouldn’t be based on reality. And since I’m all about sharing my true story and not the one I wish I was having (damn my moral compass), I have to confess…
I have NO idea what I’m talking about when it comes to finding love while traveling.
That’s right. On this topic I will be of no help.
I’m single. I haven’t had a healthy working relationship since I graduated. And given the sample population of men I’ve studied so far, I’m not sure I will find one anytime soon.
I mean, don’t get me wrong. I’m not in any hurry to find The One. I still have a lot of growing up to do before I’m ready for that relationship. I’d just like to have one that didn’t suck.
I don’t know why I thought it would be easy to find a guy who loves travel and adventure, and is also looking to share a deep spiritual (and let’s be honest, physical) connection with another person. That’s not too much to ask for, is it? I mean, there are PUH-LENTY of fish in the sea… right?
Well, I may be swimming in the wrong sea.
From what I can gather, most backpackers are flighty, non-committal, unreliable, and pretty jaded when it comes to love. It may just be the nature of the lifestyle. It’s too bad I don’t jive with this.
But for some backpackers, this isn’t necessarily a bad thing. My fellow traveler, Jeremy Foster of TravelFreak, writes about why he enjoys being nomadic and single in his guest post: Confessions of a Traveling Male.
Then again, I’ve known of other adventurers who have coupled up, traveled together, and are incredibly happy (like my friends at YTravel Blog and Lateral Movements). Even my surfing idol Holly Beck managed to find a guy who loved Nicaragua, surfing, and eco-friendly living as much as she did.
So what’s the secret? How do you fit love in your backpack?
I guess the only truthful answer I can give is I don’t really know. I’m still trying to figure it out myself.
Even though I haven’t been able to make it work, I have full confidence that it can work. After all, others have done it.
But in the meantime, I choose to focus on being happy with myself and developing friendships with the nice men I meet. Because eventually, whatever relationship I get into should form from friendship, right? And maybe from bonding over some awesome surfing?
Yeah, I know. I’m so cheesy, I should be on pizza. But sometimes cheese is good, right? :)
Do you have relationship advice for fellow travelers and adventurers? Leave it below! Let’s discuss.